Natalie Brown holds a PhD in English and Comparative Literature from Columbia University. She is writing in her personal capacity, and her views do not represent those of her employer.

A voice on the internet recently noted that some portion of Mormons would tithe even if the Church burnt their offerings. This voice arose from understandable frustration that the Church has generated billions of dollars from tithes while oversight of how that money is spent (or not spent) is lacking.

I share this frustration. I believe that such revenue should be spent on projects that address the pressing economic injustices of our moment, including reinvesting that money in LDS families who increasingly struggle in our present economy. Indeed, I have found myself thinking about tithing lately because I have recently taken a second job in order to replenish my family’s budget by approximately the same amount we pay in tithing. From the standpoint of efficiency, tithing does not make sense.

While the membership can and should discuss how tithes are spent to promote more effective stewardship, the question of how tithes should be spent is, for me, distinct from the question of whether I should pay them. God will hold those in charge of administering funds accountable. As someone who believes in God’s existence, the more pressing personal question is whether I’m willing to make the sacrifice He asks of us today.

Tithing provides money to run the Church, but it is also a commandment that comes with a spiritual promise expressed in Malachi 3:10:

“Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.”

We are instructed not only to pay our tithes but also, in doing so, to “prove” God. Tithing is the hardest commandment we are asked to keep today, and it’s understandable that we frequently balk. Unlike other commandments like the Word of Wisdom, we are not being asked to merely refrain from actions. We are being asked to give up a tenth of the material goods essential to sustaining our lives in exchange for the promise of a bountiful blessing. For me, that tenth is the difference between having the childcare and not having the childcare to pursue my career and talents. For people with less financial privilege, that amount might be their ability to visit a parent, provide education for their children, or access basic needs. These are big sacrifices—for many of us, bigger even than the time we routinely give to the Church.

It has become popular on the internet for people to say they are tithing by making charitable donations to other organizations. Donating to charity is a worthy cause and undoubtedly the right decision for many members. Commandments are rules designed to promote the happiness of the community. As with all rules, there are times when they hurt individuals. Personal revelation can tell us when following the rule is not what God wants us to do.

But, for me, tithing is not a mere charitable donation. It’s not about efficiency. It’s not about exercising my power to determine where money can promote my values. It’s a commandment—and a faith test—designed to help us “prove” or know God. It’s an exercise in letting go of our resources and power in exchange for aligning our will with God and in so doing knowing Him. It’s the path to godliness. That we do not control or dictate where the money goes is the point because we are learning to liberate ourselves from the economic and power dynamics of our society as we hand over our lives to Him.

Christ did not shy away from economics. Our relationship to money (and the food it can buy) is a constant theme of His ministry. He applauded the widow who gave everything she had and instructed that a rich man who wishes to inherit the kingdom of God must do the same. Giving up our money is entwined with the idea of following Him.

Christ’s Atonement is most frequently described through a debt metaphor. We will never have enough money to pay our debts. We can’t find salvation through our endeavors in the market. In accepting Him as our Savior, we reject the money economy for a gift one and in so doing find liberation and our divine potential. Christ is asking us in metaphorical terms to burn our money—to make an offering of it—and thereby extract ourselves from the power relations that bind us.